Yesterday I was told the terrible news that one of my closest friends from high school in Belgium, Alejandro, had sadly passed away suddenly in Chicago. At the young age of 27 he unexpectedly got a Brain Aneurysm and apparantly the doctors could not do anything to save his life. Needless to say I'm hurting. A friend with passion, with spirit, with a smile which could get kids giggling, so full of optimism will be so sorely missed. Having received a mail from him one week before he passed, his tone was one of optimism at the future and of enjoying life. He was desperately looking for a break in the world of acting and had sacrificed a lot to follow his passion. His life is an inspiration to me and having already embarked on my journey to follow my passion, it is a further reminder that should I die tomorrow, I will die a happy man who followed his heart.
That he is now gone in all but spirit is the harshest form of realisation that physical distance between friends means nothing. It is 6000 km between London and Chicago. But there is absolutely no distance between the hearts of our friends, between ourselves, our friendships. That's the reality we live in today with geographical distance no match for the strength of friendships. The strong bonds you create with certain people on this world are magical and Alejandro is and will always be a part of me.
It is especially difficult to explain the emptiness I feel today as I have not seen Alejandro since Thanksgiving 2002. My emptiness is not one of realising that we will not seeing eachother on a daily basis. That break occured many many years ago. Friendships are however forever and not bounded by distance. My friendships build on the hope, the excitement, the strength and energy caused by once again meeting and sharing the memories of the past. On the knowledge that when we reconnect we refuel our friendship, we refuel our spirits, the realisation that "Dro, you haven't changed a bit..." . The mails on a Sunday after 6 months which say "Hey, I know I've been bad at keeping in touch" that totally make your day... I gain my strength from these moments to refuel and this is the first time I have encountered the realisation that my sources of inspiration and energy, of strength and power can be taken whenever. A realisation that the memories continue and the marks from where he touched me will live on forever. It hurts that to gather strength from him now will sadly come from the past and from my memory. Ultimately Alejandro's passing has changed little in my everyday but has caused the first deep tear in my soul. I'm happy to say though that he lives on through me and all the rest of the people he touched.
"To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die." Thomas Campbell, Hallowed Ground
Alejandro was the person at St. Johns who lived closest to me. It took me probably 15 minutes to walk or 2 minutes to drive. Our families car-pooled together. We'd always go out to Brussels and Waterloo together and get lifts back together. Coming back to visit while at University we came home after a late night out and sat in the quadrangle of a school near him and drank a few beers and got chased away by the superintendents screaming strange things in flemish. The first day of school 1998 when we were both new I asked Do you play sports. He said "no, well a little Lacrosse". What you like to do? "Man i love music", Do you play an instrument "yea, guitar" and I was like "Thats really kool". We went to Bordeaux together where we both hated Toni Braxton together. We played a strange form of KOOSH ball together in the water. We sang on the roof together. We played chess at sunrise together. We spent thanksgiving together in 2002. We laughed together. We sang together. You introduced me to Mappa mundo's, my favorite bar in Brussels. You introduced me to The Cure - "Friday I'm in Love" which is our themetune. You said Rock Steady. I said PRUUUUUUUUUNE JUICE!!!!!
To Alejandro's family, there are no words that I can say but know that my positive thoughts and energy are with you through these troubled times.
To my friends, we have a bond that gives me strength and I am grateful for it and the way it fuels my life. Be careful but enjoy life.
This energy, this thought, this moment, this reflection, this clump in my throat, this sweat, these giggles, these memories, these tears and these smiles are for you Alejandro! Hope you've got the internet up there so you know that you touched my life and inspired me to live life the way it should be lived. I will continue to do so for the rest of my life. Thanks my friend...
I'll leave you with the last words he wrote to me last sunday...
"Well guys I'm off to get stuff done. I hope to run into you on-line or on the street. Talk to you soon."
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