Alejandro...

Alejandro, my brother...



Yesterday I was told the terrible news that one of my closest friends from high school in Belgium, Alejandro, had sadly passed away suddenly in Chicago. At the young age of 27 he unexpectedly got a Brain Aneurysm and apparantly the doctors could not do anything to save his life. Needless to say I'm hurting. A friend with passion, with spirit, with a smile which could get kids giggling, so full of optimism will be so sorely missed. Having received a mail from him one week before he passed, his tone was one of optimism at the future and of enjoying life. He was desperately looking for a break in the world of acting and had sacrificed a lot to follow his passion. His life is an inspiration to me and having already embarked on my journey to follow my passion, it is a further reminder that should I die tomorrow, I will die a happy man who followed his heart.

That he is now gone in all but spirit is the harshest form of realisation that physical distance between friends means nothing. It is 6000 km between London and Chicago. But there is absolutely no distance between the hearts of our friends, between ourselves, our friendships. That's the reality we live in today with geographical distance no match for the strength of friendships. The strong bonds you create with certain people on this world are magical and Alejandro is and will always be a part of me.

It is especially difficult to explain the emptiness I feel today as I have not seen Alejandro since Thanksgiving 2002. My emptiness is not one of realising that we will not seeing eachother on a daily basis. That break occured many many years ago. Friendships are however forever and not bounded by distance. My friendships build on the hope, the excitement, the strength and energy caused by once again meeting and sharing the memories of the past. On the knowledge that when we reconnect we refuel our friendship, we refuel our spirits, the realisation that "Dro, you haven't changed a bit..." . The mails on a Sunday after 6 months which say "Hey, I know I've been bad at keeping in touch" that totally make your day... I gain my strength from these moments to refuel and this is the first time I have encountered the realisation that my sources of inspiration and energy, of strength and power can be taken whenever. A realisation that the memories continue and the marks from where he touched me will live on forever. It hurts that to gather strength from him now will sadly come from the past and from my memory. Ultimately Alejandro's passing has changed little in my everyday but has caused the first deep tear in my soul. I'm happy to say though that he lives on through me and all the rest of the people he touched.


"To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die." Thomas Campbell, Hallowed Ground


Alejandro was the person at St. Johns who lived closest to me. It took me probably 15 minutes to walk or 2 minutes to drive. Our families car-pooled together. We'd always go out to Brussels and Waterloo together and get lifts back together. Coming back to visit while at University we came home after a late night out and sat in the quadrangle of a school near him and drank a few beers and got chased away by the superintendents screaming strange things in flemish. The first day of school 1998 when we were both new I asked Do you play sports. He said "no, well a little Lacrosse". What you like to do? "Man i love music", Do you play an instrument "yea, guitar" and I was like "Thats really kool". We went to Bordeaux together where we both hated Toni Braxton together. We played a strange form of KOOSH ball together in the water. We sang on the roof together. We played chess at sunrise together. We spent thanksgiving together in 2002. We laughed together. We sang together. You introduced me to Mappa mundo's, my favorite bar in Brussels. You introduced me to The Cure - "Friday I'm in Love" which is our themetune. You said Rock Steady. I said PRUUUUUUUUUNE JUICE!!!!!

To Alejandro's family, there are no words that I can say but know that my positive thoughts and energy are with you through these troubled times.

To my friends, we have a bond that gives me strength and I am grateful for it and the way it fuels my life. Be careful but enjoy life.



This energy, this thought, this moment, this reflection, this clump in my throat, this sweat, these giggles, these memories, these tears and these smiles are for you Alejandro! Hope you've got the internet up there so you know that you touched my life and inspired me to live life the way it should be lived. I will continue to do so for the rest of my life. Thanks my friend...

I'll leave you with the last words he wrote to me last sunday...

"Well guys I'm off to get stuff done. I hope to run into you on-line or on the street. Talk to you soon."

The Surprise, the week, the assessment center

I realise I haven't had the chance to write for over a week and some of you haven't found out what the surprise Anne was giving me was, how the interview went and lots of other fun stuff so I think in all fairness I'll have to start at the beginning...

As it will be long I'll put some headings for those interested in just one component...


Friday 1st May

The Interview

I had an interview at Huddle.net on Friday at 12.30... it was for a marketing and sales executive and was a very interesting role... albeit it a quite junior role, but great potential to grow and develop the role.. if you haven't used Huddle.net go onto their website here. It's a fantastic product which allows online collaboration, document sharing and project management online... It's a type of extranet/intranet hosted on the internet... great for companies and students trying to work on projects ... anyway...

So the interview consisted of me having 15 minutes to prepare a presentation on how to use Facebook and what's good about it... and then delivering it... after that we had a little chat and came to the conclusion that I was over-qualified for the role and that it wasn't quite the right role for me... gratefully though they recommended me to a recruiter called Pareto which finds sales graduate jobs... and an hour after the interview they called me up and invited me to an Assessment centre that took place yesterday...

After the interview I met up with John B and Carolina who were in town... it was fantastic to see them albeit for a short hour or two... but at 15.00 Anne told us we had to go someplace... and so we did...

The Surprise

Anne told us we were going to take the tube at Liverpool street but in fact we jumped on the Stansted Express and upon arriving there we headed right through the Security check without checking in as she'd already checked in before we got there and printed the boarding pass... I still didn't know where we were heading but I knew that we were going on a jet plane... :-)

We get to the gate as its boarding... and for the first time I realise where we are heading... the next picture MIGHT give it away...


That's right DUBLIN.... hence the Guiness (which I must say was absolutely fantastic... much better there...) YIPEEEE ... I've always wanted to go to Dublin... to Ireland... what a fantastic surprise...

Once we arrived in Dublin we were going to get a bus into the city where Anne had fixed accomodation... and as we left the Arrivals area and started looking for where to get the bus... there was KIERAN... my friend from Ireland who I met in Bratislava... Anne had sorted out for him to be in Dublin that weekend as well.. FANTASTIC!!! :-D Just gets better and better...

Here's a pic of Kieran and I at Bray Head... a beach just south of Dublin... :-)

Anne had fixed a nice apartment hotel... not far from the center of dublin... and when we got there we were told there was a leak in the room we were supposed to get so they upgraded us to their nicest "Apartment"... but it wasn't so much an apartment as a HOUSE... three floors, the largest living room I've seen for a long long time.. enough space for 8 couches... and much much more... three fantastic balcony's and 3 bathrooms... very impressive... It was right next to Shelbourne Park (The grayhound racing track in Dublin) and within eyesight from Landsdowne road (rugby and football stadium)... which is being rebuilt... for some reason I had a sneezing fit in many pictures while in Dublin but in the following pic its Shelbourne Park in the background...

There was one more surprise and that was waiting at Messrs Macguire ( a famous pub in dublin)...by O'connell bridge... And that was that Edwina, another friend of mine from Ireland who I had met in Bratislava as well, was there too... Sooo many surprises :-)


So it was an absolutely fantastic weekend away... in which we got to chill with Kieran and Edwina, see some fantastic nature outside Dublin including in Bray and and surrounding areas... !!! We also saw this old monastary which had this tower built to protect them from the Vikings, if they heard they were coming they'd just climb up using ladders and then draw the ladders up so that nobody could get in.. clever... :-)



I can't thank Anne enough for a fantastic get-away, I really needed to get away... and what better place than Dublin and to see some friends too... I'm a LUCKY guy...!!! As you can see from below...


Sadly the surprise trip was over far too fast as always but fantastic memories and nice to get out of London a bit... THANKS ANNE... I was super HAPPY as you can see



This Week

The assessment centre

So yesterday I went to an assessment center with 48 other highly talented young people... an interesting day for sure made up of group assignments, presentations and one-on-one's... at the end of the day I was asked to join a group of 11 others into a seperate room where they told us that we had "unfortunately" gone through... the old trying to trick us... but the quality of the other 11 meant that it wasn't too hard to tell that this was the group that went through... it was quite strange though because I didn't think I did a great job... anywhoo... I was one of the 12 that went through out of a group of 48 and now they're going to look for jobs for me and put me forth to final interviews with some of their clients... so hopefully something will come of it...


Temp work

I also have an opportunity to do some temp (temporary) work for an ex-colleague of mine... who needs some help structuring some statistics among other things... So if nothing else it's been a good week... albeit for one thing...


Chelsea

Chelsea (my fav. football team) played against Barcelona in the Champions League semi-final and played really well but didn't finish off their opportunities when they had them and they were "kicked in the teeth" as you say when Iniesta (a Barcelona player) scored in the last minute of the game... whats worse is the referee ( a norwegian) had arguably the worst game of his life... he missed at least 2 clear penalties and some might argue a few more than that... Luckily football is just a game... although there is soo much money and politics that its often more than that... at first I was furious but when you really think about it... the referee is only human... there are psychological factors that come into account when you have to make decisions based on what you see in high speeds... imagine you had to choose who to employ by a 3 second clip of them walking... or decide what to buy for lunch by a 1 second taste while blind-folded... yes referees are trained to see certain things... and they are in many cases professional now meaning they get paid only to to this but when the pressure is sooo immense and perhaps you are having an off day, the repurcussions are huge... I think it is understandable that the Chelsea players were absolutely furious and enraged but what can do you... sport is sport, and although I often think that Chelsea are harshly done by a lot of decisions and fate has dealt them a lot of cruel blows... I am sure it is the same for most teams.. no matter what team you support you will think that you are hard-done by because that is what you remember most...

nevertheless, the lose was a low point of the week as it was sooo close and I think Chelsea fully deserve the Champions League despite what many people argue is a bought team... my worry is that this was our last chance to win it... there is a possibility that we'll be back next year but I think we had a real chance this year particularly with the boss we have.. Guus...


So that was a little update of whats been going on with me this past week... I think it is quite outrageous that there are sooo many terrific and intelligent people out there without work at the moment which is very clear having been at the assessment center yesterday... a real pity that young people and old people alike are struggling to get work... there's a lot of us out there... and I don't think the general public really understands that...

Eventful Friday

It's due to be an eventful Friday tomorrow.

Interview at lunch. Prepared as well as I can.

And then there's the Afternoon Delight - I'm receiving a surprise from Anne. I have no idea what it is... all I've been told to do is to pack my bag as if I am to be staying at a friends house until Sunday...


Tune in on Monday to find out what happened! :-)

Oxford: you make your own Break...

You make your own breaks!

Whether you make your own opportunities to find work, to move forward in your career, to get the last toy at Toys'R'Us at the Christmas Rush or purely to organise a chance to get away... there is a lot that you can do yourself by trying.

Sometimes its not that easy to just get away because it takes quite some effort just to get out of bed. When planning is involved it's easy to take the option of doing something that takes no effort and no planning . Getting up and going when you actually can just as easily lay in bed all day can sometimes be tough. But when you do get up and go you see wonderful things. Anne and I saw Oxford on Sunday and saw some wonderful things.

You see guys in Yellow suits playing the TUBA...


Cute little kids... acting like a gangster... threatening a tree at the Botantical Gardens...

Flowers that look like witches fingernails...


Fantastic sights. It's extremely easy to get to Oxford from London. There is a bus called the Oxford Tube that runs every 15 minutes and runs all night long. Whats funny is that in Oxford all we heard was proper English. Everyone spoke with a fairly posh accent... everyone looked fairly proper as well... there were quite a few tourists but luckily you could find some quiet spots too.

Quite funny... from the Botanical Gardens in Oxford we were able to see a proper cricket game too.. reminding me of my time in Australia playing cricket.. the gentlemans sport:-) and no... we didn't watch it all... it takes several hours to play...



It's quite unbelievable that it's been 2 years since Anne and I met. It feels like just yesterday but I'm sooooo happy she is here with me in London. It's incredible how much easier it is to move with someone to share your pains and joys.

I'll leave you with some more pictures from Oxford.




As this was a nice day away and a surprise day away at that for Anne, it was great to see that she enjoyed it as much as she did. :-)

Who are they?

What would you say to this man if you sat next to him on a plane... Nicely trimmed 'tache?

This guy has doned a suit and greased his hair but normally he sells you kebab?
Perhaps a model for SpecSavers?

A guy who took the wrong door in the hotel and ended up on stage in front of thousands of people?
A bodyguard to some 5 year old superstar?
A woman who lives for the weekend and the rodeo?

What if I put numbers in front of their names....

#22 Prince Alwaleed Bin Talal Alsaud
#7 Mukesh Ambani
#16 Li Ka-shing
#19 David Koch
#24 David Thomson
#12 Alice Walton

You guessed it here is the entire list of the worlds billionaires as published by Forbes on the 11th of March.

Now chances are you won't be sitting next to one of these people on your next bus trip, or stand next to them in the queue for the cinema, but whats striking and whats interesting is that even if you did, the majority of us wouldn't recognise them.

Some of them have earned the money themselves. Some have inherited it. Some have found it in a bush beside the highway... or maybe not... I refuse to believe you stumble over that amount of money... in certain cases in which it is inherited it might not necessarily be through the hard-work and perspiration of the individual themselves....


Interestingly enough if you look up a lot of these names, many these people are also using their money to do good in the world instead of lavishly overspending on ridiculous non-essential things... I say many because obviously there is still the wastefulness of some...

Does the money make them happy... no...nothing we know makes them happier when they go to bed at night than someone who's just found a job, someone who's just written a poem or someone who has just seen the sun set... but for the majority of us we'll never understand the world they are living in... and apart from a select few we will not strive to accomplish it either...

Don't get me wrong... I like the list of the worlds Billionaires 2009. I don't think people should look down on people simply because they have money, simply because that is what drives them... nor should people worship the ground these people walk on... if there are lists for the best songs, lists for the best books, lists for the best restaurants... then why not for the worlds Billionaires... the majority of them are no more famous than you or I... they might purchase slightly more expensive things but also give more to charity... the world we live in is an intriguing place...

Here's a few lists I haven't seen though...
List of the world's happiest people... List of the world's greatest accomplishments ... list of the world's best friends... but I suppose these are far more difficult to set up standards to measure. :-) Thank god... Imagine the pressure of being the world's best friend... :-)

Ostiarius - the word of the day

An ostiarius, a Latin word sometimes anglicized as Ostiary but often literally translated as porter or doorman, originally was a servant or guard posted at the entrance of a building.


Why this word? Why today?

As some doors open, others are shut and throughout my journey to find a job here in London I've been through what seems like an infinite number of doors...

Some of the doormen are friendly when I'm on my way in, and when I'm on my way out

Others are not friendly at all, possibly cause they have too many people coming in and out of their doors...

Some doormen I know from the past and get me in through the back enterance...

And then there are the ones that are only too glad to see the back of me but who welcomed me as a king...


Today I was shown out of one door by a friendly Ostiary... the outcome however is as definite whether the Ostiary is kind, cruel or unremarkable...

Today another door opened and the doorman is someone I know...

Tomorrow one door is wide open ...


So you see... I have met a lot of these doormen, and gone through a lot of doors... but not yet got a foot in



I'll leave you with a funny picture taken on Monday... Anne and I met this pigeon while crossing a street in London... Standing and waiting until the light turned green... quite a site... fancy meeting a patient Londoner... but then again, it was Easter, he might have been an out of town pigeon...

Hmmmm... what do I see

Easter... how lovely it is to have four days off.

It's been an extremely quiet easter... London has practically been dead except for all the tourists but luckily we've stayed clear as much as possible...

Anne and I have had the apartment to ourselves... first time we've really been "alone" since I moved from Sweden in November and although we get on with our temporary flat mates really really well, it kind of reminds us that we are getting older and that we enjoy having our own space, being able to do what we like in our own apartment when we want to... not as easy when you are living with others even if you get along with them...

Thursday night Anne and I attended the filming of the Chris Moyles Quiz night. Its free to get tickets to be in the audience for these shows so its a great night out...only it takes around 4-5 hours of filming. If you want tickets you can get them from Applause store. For those of you who don't know who Chris Moyles is, he is the biggest Morning Radio DJ in the UK and has a show on BBC Radio 1... he's now launched a TV show where celebrities compete for something that Chris Moyles owns and loves. This week the winner won his BBQ. The loser has to sing karaoke...
The Celebrities we got to see were Gary Barlow (singer in the band Take That), Denise van Outen (Singer, actress, business woman) and Stephen Fry (all-around Genius and very well liked English man)...

It was a great show that aired yesterday (Sunday)... but some of the funniest parts were cut from the programs possibily because they were not PC (politically correct) or for other reasons?!?!?


Now while we're still on Thursday night, I have to highlight this... the UK has an OBESITY problem... the number of OBESE people we saw on Thursday night was INCREDIBLE!!! Literally around 10-15 members of the audience of 300 were seriously obese. That's a staggering number. All over town wherever we walked on Thursday there were Obese people. I'm talking seriously obese and I listened in to the majority of them to make sure they weren't American tourists... It's a serious issue but when you see everyone walking around with packets of crisps (chips) you understand why that is... Throughout the weekend we have continued to notice people who are not taking care of themselves. If there's one or two fine, it might ..."NOTE: it MIGHT" be a disease but this many, its damn well lazy and unhealthy people and unfortunately probably extremely sad and self-confident people too... Terrible to see and I obviously don't judge them on their weight but its a real societal problem when you see sooooooooooooo many... Note I would say the same if I thought everyone I saw was underweight too but clearly I don't see that many

Like I said before, it was a calm weekend... on Sunday we went to the Natural History museum to see the Best Wildlife Photography Exhibition... incredible pictures... highly recommend going there if you are in town before the 26th of April...

The museum was full of families... young kids with their parents... soaking up as much information as possible... its funny to see their minds fill up with knowledge... their curiousity and their willingness to scream, shout, run, trip, play, roll around on the ground, eat ice cream so that their entire face is covered in vanilla ice cream...

Realised you haven't seen a pic of me for a while so here's a pic of me outside the museum.


Interesting thing happened on the way back on the tube from the museum... Anne and I were on the tube and a quite professional looking man came on, sat down across from us and started talking, he was turned slightly to his right and talking to what we can only assume he believed was his imaginary friend... but nobody was sitting in the vicinity... he got off and I turned to Anne and said that was strange... as I did that... I slightly hesitated... what if Anne was just a figment of my imagination, my imaginary friend Anne, nobody else could see her and I thought she was here but she wasn't in fact... how strange would it be to one day wake up and find out that a friend you had was imaginary...!!! anyway, quickly realised she existed when others could notice her...:-p

This week I have two potentially interesting meetings with companies so fingers crossed... Never give up... here's a clip I found on CNN today which pretty much sums up what I'm going through as well... interesting that it affects soooo many people in so many ways...!!!



Anne and I are now goin out for a walk... bringin my camera so hope to be able to take some nice snaps...

Back to business

And surprise surprise...today I'm back in Business and super productive once more.

It's amazing what one day of reflection can do...

(by the way, I think this song is quite catchy but then I love musicals so i would)

The long and winding road...

It's been one of those days and I feel this song sums it up perfectly...

The song's been covered by numerous artists around the world since it was first released but here's the original video with the Beatles. I feel it has a strong message (and that message is not that men should grow beards and mustaches and long hair and get Japanese girlfriends).


What I've found is...

Some days the road seems short and extremely straightforward.

Other days, like today you feel like its an awfully long road which turns and jiggles it's way along and the destination seems far off in the distance. If you turn around and look back to where you've come from ... it seems a long way away ... not that you want to return. The road is unique and nobody really understands and appreciates but you and perhaps those close to you. Why didn't you just take the highway some may think? Surely that would have been simpler. But like Robert Frost wrote in his poem:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less travelled by,
and that has made all the difference

Sometimes you just have to stop... look at the damn map and remind yourself that if you just keep going you'll get there in the end... pity the map isn't all that great and you have to draw it yourself at times, eh?

At times you just want someone to pop out on the path and pull you in... force you to be a lumberjack in the forrest, a farmer in the field, a dog walker in Beverley Hills...

Other times you don't want any help at all.

Sometimes you get to the top of a peak and you see what you think and hope is your destination but you hesitate to expect too much... its dangerous... you see what you think might be your goal and you sprint 200 meters thinking its just around the hill but ultimately the sprint may only leave you breathless, disappointed and you might lose track of the goal... so you need to keep on keeping on...

It's not that I've received any bad news today, its not like my meetings with the companies over the last weeks didn't go well... on the contrary, they have all gone very well...

but the wait, the expectations and the desire to make it to your goal some days can get the better of you...

Luckily...
the path is still there...
you still have your map...
you are in control of your goals...
you have support, shelter and supplies...
you have the ability to walk, jump, climb and move uninhibited...
and tomorrow will always come.


Don't get me wrong, I certainly don't believe that I'm the only one that is on a long and winding road... everyone has their own paths... mine might not even be the "one less travelled by"... everyone has their own challenges, obstacles and dreams...nobody's is straightforward all the time, everyone has their journey and those that I believe might be currently taking the highway might not be doing so at all... everyone has those days where they just feel like its awfully long...

Whats important is to be able to step back, put it in context and enjoy it for what it is...

Yummy yummy

Nobu for Lunch on a Thursday!?!? Mathilda was kind enough to invite me for lunch at Nobu yesterday (Thursday). Scrumdidlioucious Japanese Cuisine... For those of you who have not heard of Nobu (Click here to see website http://www.noburestaurants.com/london/index.html), it is one of London's top restaurants. It has one Michelin star and is a common celebrity hang out. Our friend Jimmy used to work there as a chef and I must say I got a really good vibe of the place.

Fair enough the place isn't cheap. It's definitely not a "where should we go for quick affordable Lunch... oh lets go to Nobu" kind-of-place... unless of course you are raking it in...

But it didn't have that auro of SNOBBINESS to it that I was expecting. At least not for lunch. Normal tables, normal decoration and a normal enterance. The staff were all very friendly and polite but not annoyingly so. The food was fantastic. I ordered the Sashimi and Tempura lunch special for a mere £26 and my sister and Simon ordered the Bento box. Top quality ingredients. Top quality service and all in all a great experience. But not cheap.

One thing that struck me as strange was that there were a lot of children eating there yesterday. It didn't come across to me as a "children's menu" kind of place. We saw one hot-shot businessman father bring his harry potter looking son in and moments later answer his ringing phone and subsequently spend the next half an hour on the phone... was this Quality father-son time?!? The son looked a bit like he'd rather have been at McDonalds where he might have had a play ground to play at. When the food arrived he got a rather simple looking fillet o salmon, doubtlessly though the playground was probably in the kids mouth after he had tasted the simple looking salmon:-)

There was a guy in a business suit with a guy in jeans and a teeshirt, a large family table and some proper snobby looking business people... Interesting what Top-End restaurants attract for lunch in times of recession... :-)

On our way back, Mathilda and I wandered through Hyde Park on a lovely stroll. we've had fabulous weather here recently.

Don't know if it's only the UK but I have noticed a lot of senior looking men in business suits wearing extremely colourful socks... everything is properly conservative and then they have neon green socks... its quite odd... it makes me want to stop them in the middle of the street with one single question..."what is it you do that forces you to wear that suit when those socks indicate all you really want to do is wear wacky sunglasses, some tacky shorts and a hawaii t-shirt?"

Tomorrow we will attend the filming of a hit Political satire comedy chat show called "Argumental" here in London... looking forward to it. More news on that in a later post. And whats more I am planning on going to the Harcourt Arms to watch Malmö FF (my football team) play Häcken in the first game of the Swedish football season. Quite odd that I can watch it here in London but such is the times we are living in.